I went to go see Megadeth and Five Finger Death Punch live at Cardiff Motorpoint Arena last night on 30.01.2020.

I’m not usually in the habit of booking two concerts a week apart. There was a time between the ages of 12-18 when I went to about one a year, and 18-25 when I went to about one every 2-3 years. However; as I explained in my last post, I really wanted to see Slipknot after falling so in love with their new album, but the tickets sold out in less than a second. I thought I would book this as a consolation prize. (Then as things turned out, I ended up going to both, a week apart!).

Now I wasn’t expecting too much from this gig. I’ve been a Megadeth fan for about two decades now, but based on all the live albums they can be hit and miss live. I’d also seen Megadeth before, and Dave’s vocals were never the best live as he has to concentrate on such blistering guitar parts. Considering all we’ve been reading about Dave’s health recently, particularly as it involved the throat, I thought the singing would probably suffer even further and he also might not be in the best of spirits. Add into it that this was a short support slot instead of a nice long headliner and I was expecting a nice-enough evening out, but not a game-changer, like recent concerts at this very same venue from Parkway Drive, Ghost or Slipknot had been.

I’d also never seen Five Finger Death Punch before, despite being a fan of theirs for over a decade. Don’t get me wrong, I’d tried to see them live before. They played Manchester twice when I was there, and I queued at the box office in person both times due to an issue with Ticketmaster not recognising my address the first time and just out of habit the second time. Unfortunately the tickets were sold out each time. They’d also played Download Festival before too, and almost tempted me to commit, but I was always too afraid to go before I finally took the plunge in 2018.

I didn’t really know what to expect from FFDP live though, as the podcast I listen to always calls them an amazing live band and the next big festival headliner, but Blabbermouth was always full of stories about their singer having a breakdown on stage or their drummer being high or similar problems, and their live album, Purgatory Tales From The Pit or that bonus Live DVD that comes with ‘Wrong Side Of Heaven Part 2 both aren’t very good. (But that’s just a bonus material, so you never know).

Now, in my head I was telling myself I was there for Megadeth, and that Megadeth should have been headlining. I’d been a fan of them for longer, I like them more, and they are legendary and more important to the history of metal. You can find at least 3 Megadeth albums in almost any list of best-ever-metal-albums, but you rarely if ever see any ‘Death Punch in any such list. Megadeth have a reputation for musos at times due to their technical guitar work, and ‘Death Punch have a tough-guy image which isn’t always a positive thing. I think they have a credibility problem among the over-35s. I guess that’s why they’ve been doing things like having Rob Halford guest on a song and taking Megadeth out as a support act. They’ve definitely got the youth vote down, but a lot of people still look down their nose at them.

Don’t get me wrong I like them, I like them a lot (I’ve reviewed every single one of their albums on this blog, and given all buy one a positive review) but I always feel this tiny sense of shame about liking them. Along with Avenged Sevenfold and Bullet For My Valentine they are one of the bands I’d be kind of afraid to wear a t-shirt of, for fear of some snobby elitist making fun of me.  Now, I know that’s ridiculous, but sometimes I can’t help myself. Usually I can get over it. For example; when I grew up, in the Nu Metal era, Hair Metal was the most uncool and non-credible thing you could ever lower yourself to listen to, and I got over that mindset pretty easily and own dozens and dozens of hair metal albums now. But still… sometimes, against my better judgment, the 13 year old part of my brain rears its ugly head and sometimes worries what the ‘real fans’ will think of me, despite the fact that academically I know its all nonsense anyway, and as comedian Brian Posein very neatly put it ‘’Metal is not a competition.’’

There was, as it goes, also a third band on the bill. They were called Bad Wolves, but I arrived late due to work and missed them entirely. Not even the last song. Not one second. Not even the Cranberries cover that the internet keeps talking about. By the time I got there after work, Megadeth were already sound-checked, banners up, and there was just enough time to go to the toilet, with only three tracks over the speakers between me getting through security and when they got on stage.

(Come to think of it, last time I saw Megadeth, I missed their support band as well. Is it a Megadeth thing? Hmmm…)

Bladder now empty, Megadeth took to the stage, and I enjoyed myself a lot. One of the all time great bands and I was lucky enough to see them for a second time. It has been seven years since I last saw them and everything about my life is different, from where I live to the career I am in, to the fact that I am married and a father.

I was very grateful and pleased to get to see Megadeth again. There were a few downsides though; first off, the sound was a bit muddy. Dave’s vocals were super low in the mix and I had to strain to hear anything.  (I guess that’s better than jarring bad vocals, but still). The hi hats were also too low if we’re getting pedantic. Secondly; I don’t know if its just were I was stood, but considering I was more interested in Megadeth than ‘Death Punch, there was a lack of audience energy around me for the first half of the show. This is one of the most important bands in the business. Nobody was singing along to ‘Wake Up Dead’ for goodness sakes, which is tantamount to a crime in my book. Bizarrely, they didn’t even sing along to ‘Trust’ which was one of the biggest sing-longs when I saw them last time.  Its not a great feeling when you are having way more fun that everyone around you. Thirdly, the aforementioned length of the set. I mean, how do you do a short setlist when you have so many albums and almost all of them are crazily good?  (To be honest, I could see them perform their first six albums in their entirety and still hunger for more. I’d be all like ‘Aw man, they didn’t play ‘’Blackmail The Universe’’ or ‘’Endgame,’’ I wish they had longer’)

But these are minor complaints. I enjoyed the show. And when they played tracks off of Countdown To Extinction the crowd sang along, so its not like there was no enthusiasm from the crowd. Although the sound mix wasn’t perfect you could hear all the guitar parts, which is what you need most from Megadeth. And of course, I think we can all cut the vocals some slack given the recent health issues. Also, although it was short on time, they packed it with hits and even threw in a few deep cuts from Rust In Peace and one song off the new album.  

I’ve been looking on SetlistFM, and found out that on this tour, the setlist was pretty set in stone, but there is always one song per night that could change. For example, they’ll always play nine of the same songs they played tonight, but there is one spot where you can get something different, such as ‘She Wolf,’ ‘A Tout La Mond,’ ‘The Conjuring,’ or ‘Mechanix.’ Tonight we got ‘Mechanix’ which I was chuffed for, as it was one of my favourite songs and they didn’t play it last time I saw them. I have very fond memories of ebing a teenager and failing to master it on guitar or drums, but having much fun in the effort.  

Between songs, Dave did a speech in which he announced he was now, quote, ‘’100% cancer free’’ which was a nice moment. I deal with a lot of death a misery and disease at work so its nice to see it work out for someone. There were lots of nice moments. Hey, for not headlining, they sure did have a good light show. Hey, this new guitarist Kiko from Angra, is quite good. Hey, I guess they don’t have a lot of time, but they sure are making it count, with all the unmissable tracks like ‘Wake Up Dead’ ‘Hanger 18’ ‘Holy Wars’ and ‘Peace Sells’ all represented. Dave seemed in a very good mood all night, very amused by the Vic Rattlehead actor who came out towards the end, and coming out for extra applause after it ended, to briefly playing air guitar to a Sid Vicious song.  

Overall, while not the world’s best concert, very far from poor. I had a good time. (I’ve been really spoiled these last two years, with the showmanship of Alice Cooper, the fun of Volbeat, the satisfaction of Slipknot, the much anticipated Libertines, and the love-those-songs good times of Corrosion Of Conformity).

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Next up, it was time for Five Finger Death Punch. I really didn’t know what to expect. I could go either way really.

When they took to the stage the crowd went really wild. I knew they had a big fan following, even if the critics are snobby about them, but boy I was not prepared for how wild the crowd went for them. All the enthusiasm that was missing for Megadeth, they had in spades for ‘Death Punch. The sing-alongs were so loud, the cheers so energetic, it was crazy to see just how much people loved them. I mean, I am a big fan, with all their records, singing all the choruses and most of the verses to all the songs tonight, and I almost felt like a bit of a fraud, (like…wow…why don’t I love them that much?). Based on tonight’s crowd reaction, I have a feeling that once there is a generation-change in the critics, then this band are going to be classified as one of the real big names in metal, the way Slipknot and System Of A Down are now, even though they were the new upstarts lacking credibility with the old guard when I was young.

Speaking of Slipknot, rather strangely, singer Ivan Moody made a little speech about how he was similar to Slipknot’s Corey Taylor because they both survived overdoses and didn’t take shit from anyone, which seemed a bit weird, but then he also did a good speech about sobriety. And he sang happy birthday for a little 13 year old kid and got everyone to shine their phones/lighters to represent birthday candles. He also did a bit about what an honour it was to meet Dave Mustaine and how important So Far, So Good, So What was to him as a kid. I was really impressed with him as a front man, he seemed like a really warm, genuine and humble guy. Which is interesting, as I always had him pegged as being a big douche, but I guess addiction may have had a big part in that, or maybe press misrepresentation (I mean, they have at least three songs about how he is misrepresented by the press, and played two of them live tonight).

There was a moment, during the power ballad ‘The Wrong Side Of Heaven’ when he said how he didn’t like to talk about his lyrics and preferred the fans to make their own interpretation. Now, this is where I got a bit sceptical. I mean, they aren’t Tool. These aren’t mystical esoteric songs with triple meanings. Most of the songs, in my mind, essentially boil down to swearing whilst threatening to beat someone up. In my mind, if you mix Limp Bizkit’s ‘’Full Nelson’’ and Pantera’s ‘’Five Minutes Alone’’ threats with Slipknot’s ‘’Surfacing’’ swearing, then you get 99% of Five Finger Death Punch lyrics. Turns out, in actual fact however, that the song was actually about his dead grandmother. Who knew?  I guess I was being a bit of an elitist too. My bad. I’ll work on that.

They played a really great setlist tonight, with about 2-3 songs from every album, plus one new song from their upcoming next album F8. They played a mixture of fast songs, groovy heavy songs and then a few quieter tracks in the middle for balance. They played most of the big singles but a few deeper tunes. I was over the moon to hear tracks from the first two albums like ‘Never Enough’ and ‘Burn It Down’ and I was excited to hear the new song ‘Inside Out.’ I even enjoyed the cheesy country cover ‘Blue On Black’ live, which I was initially sceptical of when I first got And Justice For None.

They put on a good show too, with an even bigger light show than Ghost had. They had their big mascot back drop, lots of pyro and  guitarist Jason Hook rose up into the sky at one point. Several songs featured very large quantities of confetti, and even though they aren’t a theatrical band, Ivan had some mini-costume changes throughout the show (such as switching between a top-hat and cane for ‘Jekyll and Hyde’ a t-shirt that said ‘I hate me 2’ for one of their more self-deprecating songs, and Fred Durst style baggy outfit at the start).

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The sound was good. Much better than it had been for Megadeth. Not quite as good as say Slipknot, Parkway’ or Ghost from recent times at the same venue, but pretty damn good. The actual musician’s performance was also good. Zoltan and Jason played great leads, bassist Chris Kael had a lot of physical presence and handled the backing vocals enthusiastically, there was a very entertaining and not boring drum solo from new-ish drummer Charlie Engen (I still find it weird that Jeremy Spencer is gone, he was always one of the most in the press members of the band and the person’s face I see in my mind’s eye when someone says the band’s name).

This was a great night overall. I know that beforehand I was sort of expecting this to be a let down after what a great run of concerts I’ve had lately, but I’ll be danged if tonight wasn’t great as well. I was extra impressed due to aforementioned the weird psychological prejudice I have about them and fear of judgement from snobs. It sounds like sort of a backhanded compliment, but I was extra impressed none-the-less. You expect the ‘70s and ‘80s legends to be amazing, but its always nice when bands from the last 15 years or so can match or succeed the greats. It gives you hope for the future of the genre. Highlights included ‘Under and Over It,’ ‘Wash It All Away’ and the final song, and their best song, ‘The Bleeding.’ (‘Burn MF’ was also notable for how much pyro they set off during it).

That’s all for tonight folks. Luckily for my bank account, I don’t have any more concerts next week, so this will be the last concert post for a while, but I will be going to catch Bay Area Thrash legends Testament and Exodus, with support from Death Angel in a few months, so you’re not quite safe from gig reviews just yet.

Megadeth – Dystopia Review

Well, for those fans looking forward to a blistering ‘holy cow’ return-to-form story, there may be some disappointment. Despite the interesting new band line-up with Angra’s Kiko Loureiro and Lamb of God’s excellent drummer Chris Adler; Dystopia, Megadeth’s fifteenth full-length studio album is not necessarily the career highlight that hype and wishful thinking may have lead us all to believe.

The new lineup is great and not gimmicky, but its still the Mustaine show here on Dystopia. Band-leader Mustaine still writes a huge percentage of the music, so despite the line-up, it doesn’t suddenly sound much like Angra or Lamb Of God either, although you can definitely pick up on their involvement during breakdowns or solos if you’re paying attention.

With that out of the way, Dystopia is a good album. Of course it is. It’s a Megadeth album that isn’t Risk, of course it’s a good album. Its more or less the same Megadeth album that the last four ones have been, with about the same level of similarity and difference as each of the last four have had with each other. Its slightly heavier than 2013’s Supercollider, its slightly more consistent than 2011’s Thirteen and slightly thrashier than 2007’s United Abominations, but when all is said and done, its relatively similar to them all, especially the less famous mid-album stuff. 2009’s Endgame is arguably the closest record to this stylistically in the Medageth catalogue; thrashy yet modern, ‘fast’ on paper but still varied and with plenty of mid-tempo moments, energetic and revitalized but not necessarily earth-shattering. They’re arguably quite similar in quality too, as well as stylistically.

If you’ve enjoyed Megadeth’s recent output, this is good. Its good for me, I’ve been really keen on all the recent albums personally. If you only like a particular period such as the ‘80s or ‘90s however, I’d give up now because despite the hype there’s not that much difference here to anything the band have turned-in since the millennium.

There are a few interesting moments here and there, such as a touch of piano and spoken-word at the end of ‘Poison Shadow’ or some Spanish guitar at the beginning of the instrumental ‘Conquer Or Die’ but again, nothing you haven’t heard before from a band with such a long and storied career as Megadeth …who have covered a lot of ground already in their time. Apart from having a cover of Fear’s ‘Foreign Policy’ at the end, which admittedly fits in well thematically with the majority of the rest of the record’s tone anyway, the album doesn’t particularly have any stand out moments or obvious hits, it isn’t an album of highlights and filler, it feels very consistent, and benefits from being absorbed in a single listening session rather than picked and chosen from. That’s a good thing though, this is a good album that works well as an album, that is good all the way through and that feels like a complete ‘whole.’

With all of that being said, its then understandably hard choose favourite tracks from Dystopia; for me ‘Lying In State’ is one of the strongest, a track which sounds very close to the style of the faster stuff on 2004’s The System Has Failed, and has lead guitar lines that don’t sound much like any previous Megadeth material. Another noteworthy track would be the fun, bouncy ‘The Emperor’ which feels like the better Thirteen material and would sit rather nicely beside ‘Whose Life Is It Anyway?’ in concert.

Overall; Dystopia is another post millennial Megadeth album of strong quality that satisfies on every level, but that probably won’t go down in the history books. The guitars are sharper, the vocals have more snarl and the lyrics are a bit more politicized than Supercollider for example, but I think ‘business as usual’ is a fairer summation of the record than ‘best album since…’ because, for me at least, Megadeth have been dishing out high quality, enjoyable, entertaining albums of this quality all along.

Get (Into) What You Paid For – Round 4: Episode 4 Day 18

Hello and welcome to my “Get (Into) What You Paid For” challenge, in which I attempt to not buy anything for a month, and reevaluate my opinion of records I bought previously but never really became a true fan of, taking this purchase-abstinence as a chance to finally “get my money’s worth” out’ve the more undervalued albums in my collection. That; and present thoughts and musings that don’t fit elsewhere on the blog.

Ok. Its now Day 18. Apart from the mistake with the excitement of the Machine Head tickets, there have been no purchases. I damn near bought the comic book Crisis On Infinite Earths but fought it off at the last minute. I also nearly bought a few Megadeth b-sides as single mp3s but shook that off too.

Other than that, I’m pretty temptation free. I’ve spent most of my time watching documentaries on Netflix about health and food and vegetarianism (I’m not a vegetarian myself, but it was still good entertainment), lifting weights and eating more fruit and veg than I did in the entire last two months, maybe three months (I let my healthy eating slide about a year ago and am getting back to normal again now). If you watch the documentaries it really reminds you to get your vitamins and minerals. If I was in charge, I’d make kids watch them once every year to just remind them. At least they’d probably eat veg for a month every year. Even that small thing would add years to their lives and oodles to their quality of life later on.

But enough health propaganda. What about music?

I am also happy that my copy of Accept’s Blind Rage has dispatched. I should hopefully receive it tomorrow. Just in time for my free holiday to mainland Europe. It would be nice to have Blind Rage for the bus ride to the airport.

What else? I finally finished Dave Mustaine’s autobiography. It was really interesting, it goes from his childhood right up until the writing of Endgame, and although the period from United Abominations to Endgame is really, really short compared to everything else (every other album and tour cycle gets a detailed story), this is a remarkably consistent, honest, interesting and deep book.

He discusses his flaws, his embarrassments and his mistakes in a way that makes you understand how he thinks and how much of this can be attributed to drugs, and how much is just his personality. You can see where the different parts of his problems come from. You can see why the Metallica-firing hurt so much and really understand him. You can also see what a jerk he was to people. He points out his hypocrisies and bad decisions. On a human level, its just a really interesting and brutally honest book. (A warning though, it is a tad too homophobic at times.)

In addition to finishing that book I’ve also finished the DC Comic Book Crossover story Final Crisis. This is a story in which the stories from a bunch of different superheroes (Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern etc.) all crash into one larger story. It’s an apocalypse sort of story. Mind control, dark gods, the end of the universe. Big name characters die or are injured. The consequences of this story affected things for a while afterwards. Apparently it was a huge deal at the time.

It’s a remarkably intelligent work that works on several levels as a commentary on comic books, stories, authors, and the responsibilities and rights associated with those things. The first time I read it, roughly one year ago, I was beyond baffled. Impenetrable would be a fair description. This time around, armed with documentaries about its author, Wikipedia breakdowns of the plot and characters, a years worth of Batman experience, a detailed series of fan analysis online and more patience than last time… I went in prepared and was rewarded. I enjoyed it a lot. I was entertained, I was impressed, I was educated. Good job. I’d happily read it again now that I’ve “got it.” I’d recommend it too, so long as you already like Grant Morison’s style.

I’ve also been watching The Metal Voice. I had watched things like this before at times such as Dom’s Iron Sandwhich and Cover Killer Nation. Youtube shows that are basically a podcast about heavy metal, often in the form of a man looking at a webcam and reviewing a Metal album. The Metal Voice is slightly better than most others in that they put some effort into it and its more like a public access TV show sometimes. Plus its Canadian. I thought they were really unfair with Slipknot… but oh well, can’t have everything.

So… time to appreciate some albums I bought but never felt like I got my money’s worth out of:

Serj

I’m going to re-listen to Serj Tankian’s debut studio album, 2007’s Elect The Dead. This solo record, recorded shortly after the dissolution of the at-the-time absolute superstar band System Of A Down (an acrimonious demise that left you unsympathetic to the guys in the band), this album kind of passed me by as a bit throwaway.

Sure, here’s a new album, but who really cares?

It opens up with “Empty Walls” which is pretty much System Of A Down. Its also surprisingly awesome. I remember not liking it at the time because a) I had kind of got bored of SOAD and b) It seemed repetitive. Furthermore, it was 2007, so I was probably listening to nothing but Genesis, Yes, Pink Floyd, Camel, Rush, Gentle Giant, Jethro Tull and ELP… Serj doesn’t really fit in with that sort of palate.

Listening back now, this song is a real “hit single” or “classic song.” Regardless of its actual financial success, artistically, this is as good as any SOAD hit. Its as good to me as “Sugar” or “Chop Suey” or “B.Y.O.B.”

The next song, “Unthinking Majority” is pretty much the same… a brilliant catchy single that is as good as any SOAD banger. It has a bit more of an Eastern-tinge, and an awkward time-change dynamic with keyboards that is similar to stuff on his next album Imperfect Harmonies. This song is pretty great too.

Next comes “Money.” It starts off as a soulful, piano-led sort of ballad. Then there is an explosive BYOB-style racket of energetic metal/punk noise. Then it goes back to the keyboard stuff. This is also a pretty great song, and the softer side provides contrast to the previous tracks, but the chorus keeps it from feeling like a slowing-down. The pre-chorus is excellent. Nice song.

This is followed by “Feed Us.” Oh, what’s the point? You know what? This WHOLE ALBUM can be summed up by my feelings for “Empty Walls.” I wasn’t in the mood when the album came out, but this is way better than it is given credit for. A forgotten gem.

Every song is a short 2-4 banger that could be a lead single on any other album. Well, except the somber album closer… but apart from that moody number, every song could be a bouncy first-single.

Apart from the lack of Daron’s backing vocals you can barely tell it isn’t a SOAD album. The highlights for me are “Lie Lie Lie,” “Saving Us” and “Sky Is Over.” Even the track “Baby” which I used to hate for being a bit too wacky (in a cheesy way, rather than in a Protest The Hero tasteful-but-hectic way) with its silly pronunciation of the word “Baby” is actually a fabulous song. This is a rock solid album. Way, way better than it is given credit for. More consistent than most SOAD records. Better than the majority of solo albums from anyone in the Alternative Metal/Nu Metal spectrum.

Serj 2

Wow. This is good. Its lead me to listen to Imperfect Harmonies too. Its good. Not just as good (and if you are in the mood for a Rock Band playing Rock Songs its not right for you because its more like a Nine Inch Nails album, in that one artist with a laptop and a keyboard has written an electronics and vocals based record.) If it wasn’t for the big style-shift, this would be a lot better received. If you’re in the mood for it, this is a real strong album. In and of itself, for what it is, this is really strong.

Following that, I’ve just given his most recent effort, Harakiri, again. Its good. It sounds trite, but it is the halfway point between both of those records and his discography would make more sense if this was released between the first and second albums. I liked it at the time, I like it now. Its highlights, including “Figure It Out,” “Occupied Tears,” “Uneducated Democracy” and “Weave On” are all strong and worth your time. It mightn’t be the most strong and consistent record ever, but its highlights are all pretty sweet.

MSG

What else is it time to get my money’s worth? How about my boxset of Michael Schenker Group albums? I listened to all four studio albums in preparation for this article. They are a pretty decent band. They are sort of like a mixture between Thin Lizzy without the Thin-Lizzy unique touch, with 70s Judas Priest without their heaviness, with Coverdale era Deep Purple without their funk. Also some real pop radio choruses that can feel out of place. Awesome guitar solos as you would expect. Its really a guitar album (or albums). Its such a weird point between Rock and Metal that I can’t compare it to anything else I know (apart from UFO, obviously). I would love to hear Children Of Bodom or someone like that cover their songs. “Attack Of The Mad Axeman” is the prize find of the collection, an absolutely wonderful rock song. Such a fun riff! – The rest of it is a mixed bag of mostly good but rarely memorable. Every time I’ve ever listened to them, I’ve liked them more, but I’ve never gotten to the boy-oh-boy-I-love-this-band stage. Still, I don’t regret buying the nice cheap boxset of five albums (there’s a live album in it too), but I think it’ll take a few more listens before I feel I’ve gotten my money’s worth.

FF

On the subject of getting your money’s worth. I also spent last night listening to Burn My Eyes and Demanufacture. What can I say, I liked these two albums a lot anyway, and I already feel I got my money’s worth out of them, but I had some sort of real revelation last night and I really, really “got them” in a new way.

Its like, every other time I listened to them, there was a cloud of static in my brain. Like when you see a difficult math equation and you can’t even try to solve it because there is a cloud of static in your brain. Its that same exact feeling, and it has just cleared. I heard what a truly wonderful album Demanufactue is last night in a way I never knew before, in the entire decade (and more) since I bought it.

Sometimes its hearing another album, or seeing a documentary, or using new speakers, or a new EQ setting, or simply aging, but sometimes my brain just totally changes shape and new things come in. On first listen, Dream Theater’s Scenes From A Memory was a cheesy mess of stolen ELP parts and no Metal, and now it is a masterpiece and surprisingly heavy.

Now, Burn My Eyes and Demanufacture just got some “golden ticket” invitation to the awesome centre of my brain. Interesting how this stuff happens. I’d like to see some neurological data about it, but…. Failing that, I’ll just blog about it here and see what you guys think is going on?

What is the cloud of static in my brain, and why has it shifted away from these two records?

Amateur Batfan: Volume 15 – Cacophony

Hello and welcome to the fifteenth installment of Amateur Batfan, a series of blogposts here at Kincrimsonblog where I try something new. Instead of writing exclusively about music like I usually would, I’m dipping my toes into the field of writing about comics. I’m fairly new to comics. You can read about my history with the comics medium in the first entry of the series.

Long story short, I liked comics-related stuff but found the whole idea of being a comics fan too embarrassing, and some of the comics I did try were lacking-in-depth, so I didn’t like comics themselves until my friend Paul opened my mind, multiple times over the years until I finally allowed myself to enjoy them. I had a sort of snobbery to overcome. Its been overcome now though, and I’ve spent most of the last year buying and reading Batman comics, which I will now blog about for your reading pleasure and commenting-inspiration (seriously, I want to know what you think about these comics).

This week, I’ll be covering Cacophony; a brief three-issue story (but part of a wider trilogy with The Widening Gyre and Bellicosity) which was written by Kevin Smith. Kevin Smith is best known for his films and impressive podcasting empire, as well as his part on the TV show Comic Book Men, and has worked on numerous comics before including Green Arrow and Daredevil. I haven’t read those. I haven’t read his comics about other superheroes yet. I have read his comics about his own films though, in the Tales From The Clerks compilation, but that’s about it.

I’m a huge, huge fan of his podcasting though (amazing free entertainment by the bucket full), and still have a lot of fondness for most of his films which I loved as a teenager but have seen too much and heard too much criticism of, and overall learned too much about to be able to ever really “just watch” anymore.

Kevin has a sense of humour which includes frequent jokes about sex, sex organs, drugs and scat-humour, as well as a tendency to talk about and reference real life people he knows. These seem sort of incompatible with Batman. All the other Batman I’ve ever read has avoided joking about sex, or talking about Batman’s genitals, or involving all that much faeces.

Needless to say, people, as far as I’ve read online did not appreciate when Smith included some of his sense of humour in Batman. Its very un-Batman to use the words “I saw a bit of your Junk when you were getting changed.” It just is.

I would just say this however… what did you expect? Kevin Smith + Batman = Kevin Smith’s Batman, surely? Why would you get someone unique like Kevin Smith and then have him just lose his uniqueness and not seem like Kevin Smith? That would be like getting Quentin Tarinto to direct an episode of a TV show and then just expecting him to do what the previous director was doing… a bit of a waste.

If you really dislike Kevin Smith…why did you read it? Its not as if there is any shortage of alternative Batman books to read. Its not like Metallica, where they only make one album every five years. There are many, many Batman books released and re-released every year and if you really can’t stand Kevin Smith it would be quite easy to give Cacophony a miss.

I’ve been wanting to re-read this for quite a while (every time I listen to Fatman On Batman I get the urge to read it) but I’ve been saving it until I was ready to write one of these articles about it. I’ve kind of shot myself in the foot a little by starting this series, but oh well.. I got to re-read it now and that’s all that matters.

Batman

Batman – Cacophony:

– Writers: Kevin Smith
– Art: Walt Flanagan
– Colours: Sandra Hope

– Continuity: Post-Crisis, Pre-Flashpoint

– Timeline Position: Late Career

– Batman is: Bruce Wayne

– Villains: Joker, Zsasz, Deadshot, Onomotepeia, Maxie Zeuss

– Allies: Alfred Pennyworth, James Gordon (Police)

– Bystanders: N/A

– References: Barbara Gordon, John Paul Valley, Jason Todd, Mad Hatter, Amygdala, Calendar Man, Scarface, Riddler, Clayface, Connor Hawke as Green Arrow,

– Story: [/Spoilers] A new villain called Onomotepia, comes from Star City to Gotham to kill Batman, via the means of distracting him by freeing the Joker from Arkham. He interrupts an unrelated assassination attempt by Deadshot during which Joker learns that Maxie Zeuss is selling Joker Venom as a designer drug. Joker is offended and starts a war with Zeuss including murdering his nephew and setting fire to his nightclub with a flamethrower while impersonating a celebrity DJ. Batman, fresh from stopping Zsasz kill random innocents tries to recapture joker, meets Onomotopia and they battle. Onomotopia betrays joker to save himself leaving Joker mortally wounded and Batman choses to save Joker’s life rather than pursue Onomotopia despite the arrival of Commissioner Gordon who tries to convince Batman to just let the Joker die from his wounds. After a lengthy coma, Joker awakes to find Batman, dressed as Matches Malone meet him in hospital to clear up this issue of whether the two want to kill eachother or not. Batman says no, Joker says yes. In an epilogue Batman jokes with Alfred and Onomopepia goes back to his life as a family man and his secret plans to kill Batman.

– Tone: I’ll discuss this at the end, because they kind of go hand in hand.

– Art: Inconsistent. Walt draws so many different faces for the same Joker. Gets better as it goes along though, just needs more consistency. Also, he draws humans better than either Batman or Joker. His Gordon and Maxie Zeus-as-businessman look perfect, I’m just not keen on the way Batman’s face and mask look. The book is beautifully coloured actually though, it looks gorgeous with glossy paper and vivid colours.

– My Thoughts: Not the worst Batman story I ever read. Not even close. I actively enjoy Cacophony. If you ignore the fact that the dialogue has a bit more Smith-esque humour than would usually be found, this is actually a pretty entertaining and enjoyable story with some neat, memorable moments. And you know what, some of the jokes actually made me smile too. Its not like its 100% liking it despite the jokes, sometimes its just liking it… on its own terms. I liken it to listening to Megadeth. At first you are like “Dave Mustaine has a weird voice” but then you are later like “Screw it, a good song is a good song.” Admittedly, nowadays I love Mustaine’s voice totally and completely… can’t say I’ll ever love penis jokes within a Batman story, but hey, I can’t make every analogy 100% critique-proof.

I really enjoy some moments such as Zsasz getting surprised and also getting kicked through the door in a presumable homage to Madlove. I really love Jokers’ “Now do you get the Joke?” moment with Maxie.

Also, I just really love Onomotepia. He is a really neat villain uniquely suited to the medium he was invented for. Good look, good gimmick. If I ever wrote a Batman story, I’d include or at least reference him. His coolness adds a good few points in the book’s favour.

Negatives-wise; I do question some of the Jewish humour, slightly wary that it’s a bit distasteful (“Unholy Bris” ? Hmmm…). …And admittedly some of the dialogue and choices are contradictory to a lot of other writers (Gordon encourages Batman to let Joker die when other books make Gordon stop situations like this.)

It’s a Batman book I don’t regret buying, and would have no problems reading again. Maybe I’m being unfairly lenient to balance out people who were unfairly critical, that is possible, I mean, I don’t think I’d forgive other writers for a Batmite-themed Deadmaus-style DJ or a letter in which Joker calls Batman emo-boy (does Joker keep abreast of music trends and internet-era humour and expressions? Maybe, maybe not…).

Either way, I don’t think I’d recommend it to you if the idea of toilet humour in Batman is appalling, but I enjoyed it more than all the negative internet vibes made me think I would. That’ll do…