Get (Into) What You Paid For: Round 4 – Day 40

Hello and welcome once more to yet another edition of my blog series, Get (Into) What You Paid For; a series in which I blog about music and media I own, to distract myself from the fact that I am sworn off buying anything new for a month (or in this case, two months).

Its day 40, and I haven’t spent anything new in the last three days… hey, I’m getting the hang of this! Maybe if I keep this going long enough I’ll be able to break free of the habit of spending so frequently. I could use that money for fresh fruit and vegetables! (I’m on a health kick at the moment and that seems like the best use of my money in my current state of mind). I’ve also been experimenting with baking and online grocery shopping with mixed results. I’m planning on being a more successful human being for the next year, more organized and nourished and with more strings to my bow.

Continuing this self-improvement theme, I’ve also decided to cycle for 20-minutes after work every day from when I return to work following my current time-off, all the way up until Christmas. To sure-up this decision, I spent last night making dozens of 20-minute playlists in iTunes for cycling to. (Well, most of them end up being 22 minutes). The main theme of each playlist is pick about 5 songs from about 5 different artists within one subgenre.

So for example: 1 Saxon song, 1 Diamond Head song, 1 Iron Maiden song, 1 Angel Witch Song, 1 Motorhead song…. and then call that playlist “NWOBHM 1.”

In this spirit I have made: 9 Classic Rock Lists, 9 Thrash Metal lists, 9 NWOBHM/Early Metal lists, 9 Thrash Metal lists, 8 Glam Metal lists, 6 Power Metal lists, 5 Metalcore lists, 4 Groove Metal lists, 2 NYHC lists, 2 Indie Lists, 2 Nu Metal lists, 1 Stoner Rock list, and 1 Melodeath list.

Oh yeah, and two lists of Thrash bands’ ‘90s hits…like “Symphony Of Destruction,’ ‘Only,’ ‘Enter Sandman’ etc.

I only chose jaunty up-tempo songs; no ballads, no interludes, no intros, no doomy songs, nothing proggy… just stuff that would make me want to continue cycling. Its basically that I always get a shower when I get home from work, but I am always hesitant to do any exercise once I’ve had a shower because it’s a waste of water and therefore money, and so I’ve decided that I could squeeze in a small bit of exercise after each work day so its not too tiring (and get rewarded by hearing 5 or so classic songs) but since I’ll still work up a sweat it would be advisable before my usual post-work shower. Hopefully it makes me squeeze in exercise all the time, rather than doing it properly when I’m in the mood, but more often ending up doing nothing when it can’t be done right… as they say: “Don’t let Perfect be the enemy of Good.”

Anyway, enough health propaganda, on to the main article:

Since my recent birthday, I’ve been describing how I’ve been reading Martin Popoff’s Top 500 Metal Albums book, and this has not changed. I’ve been happily reading away at this yesterday too, now up to around number-300. It’s a damn good book and I highly recommend it. Even if there are a few small mistakes (eg. he said that Michael Kiske was the singer on Helloween’s Walls Of Jerhico, but it was really Kai Hansen) and sometimes his sentences lack all grammatical logic or you can tell he forgot to type words here and there, it is still a very entertaining and well put-together product.

I’ve also spent the last few days listening to the following albums:

I decided to put this record on again because I recently read an article online which was about biggest disappointments/flops. Untouchables was in it. I thought to myself…”surely not?” I remembered at the time, everyone loved it. They filmed the successful comeback show with loads of songs from it. People on Metal podcasts I listened to remembered it fondly. I listened to it again last night, and yeah, there’s a wee bit of filler (like EVERY Korn record) but it is in no way a weak album for them, plus lead single and album opener “Here To Stay” is just an absolute smasher! Oh yeah, and I looked it up on Wikipedia this morning and that also suggests it is one of the band’s most popular albums. What about the verse to “Embrace” ? …or the chorus to “Wake Up Hate” ?

Disappointment? Pfft…

This album is a weird one for me; I listen to tracks from it almost daily on shuffle, but I have this weird “I don’t listen to this album enough” feeling all the time because I don’t sit down and listen to it in its entirety often enough. Well, I tried to put that right, and its one of my favourite Motorhead records when you add up all the songs I like (although I just usually don’t listen to them together… something it shares in common with Faith No More’s Angel Dust as a matter of fact). Some people called this one a disappointment, or dislike the production. Not me, I love it. Love it all. So many great tracks. Great atmosphere. Its charming. “(Don’t Let ‘Em) Grind Ya Down” is especially fun. Heck it all is; no filler!

I listened to this yesterday whilst weightlifting because I have elderly neighbors in my temporary accommodation and I didn’t want them to have to hear Hatebreed, which is what I was really in the mood for at the time, but I’m a considerate neighbor when all is said and done.

I remember I bought this for super-cheap (around a penny I seem to recall, or maybe one pound at an absolute maximum!) just to have something to talk about with a coworker in my last job, who had an Alkaline Trio tattoo. I’m not really keen on it. I always liked their single “Private Eye” but unfortunately its about the only song on this album that is memorable. Its all competent but its just a bit bland and forgettable. Oh well, a Penny for a few conversations and “Private Eye” …not too much of a waste. Its not like I’ll have to quit doing fucked-up shit.

I’ve mentioned before about how I got this in 2010 and never felt like I’d listened to it enough. I still feel that way. Even with a recent attempt at a revival of it by adding it to my phone on work trips and during my Dutch holiday. To its credit, there are some great songs on the record, like the Title Track, “The Alchemist” and “Talisman.” I just somehow never feel like I give it enough attention though. I’ll keep trying, because it is good, its just… demanding.

This was a birthday gift. It’s the modern Helloween line-up trying to do their version of the Keepers’ albums. BOTH Keepers! It’s a double album, each with a 10 minute epic, a few fast thrashers, a ballad each, and a fun off-the wall song.

Its kind of exhausting. I can tell there’s good stuff on it, because I like Deris-era Helloween a lot anyway. But, its just a huge amount to take in at once. Without the mental division of individual albums the way the original Keepers Part 1 & 2 had. You feel overworked listening to it.

Some people are down on sequel albums, especially those late in a career. I like Operation Mindcrime 2 and Thick As A Brick 2 though… so I’ll give this one a chance as well. It just might take a long time to absorb.


I went for a run the other day, and the soundtrack to this sweaty affair was the suitably sweaty Manowar albums I got for my birthday, all together (Not just the one pictured, but Triumph Of Steel and Fighting The World too) on shuffle. These albums are really growing on me. Sure the drum solos in “Achilles” are pace-killers and that spoken word track is too long, but this is a seriously fun band with some seriously great Metal songs to offer. All of their fast songs are almost instant-favourites of mine, catapulted into Best Of playlists already. This is a good boxset and these albums are showing some real promise to join the best of Helloween and Gamma Ray at the top of my Power Metal pile… almost eclipsing Stratovarius already!

Absolute masterpiece. I’ve spent enough time talking about it. I think its one of the best records ever made, by anyone. I just need to listen to it regularly because I don’t want it to slip out of listening. (Once I let “Crack The Skye” go, it didn’t come back the same).

Another birthday gift. Very fun, pleasant, upbeat and happy record. Perfect listening for this sunshine, and for this good-mood inspired by the exercise and healthy-eating zone I’m in. Also nice and brief, lightweight and succinct. Easily digestible, quick and cheerful stuff for instant gratification and no-brains smiles being put on my face.

I’ve tried once more last night, despite feeling like it wasn’t very good and even with new attention, I just don’t really like this album much at all. I really like their debut, don’t get me wrong, its not just thoughtless Poison-bashing here, I just don’t like this Posion album. This one is just a bit empty. There’s nothing in the style I want from them, and there’s no catchy perfect fun in an alternative style to the one I want either. Its just very bland and unexciting. Nothing “grabs” me.

Halfway between the first and the third. Not just as memorable as their debut, or as forgettable as their third album, this has stuff going for it, but isn’t “wow, this album is great!” either. An enjoyable listen, that will eventually be boiled down to just the best few tracks and mostly ignored otherwise. I like “Back On The Rocking Horse,” “Bad To Be Good,” and “Look But You Can’t Touch” as well as the Kiss-esque hit single “Nuthin But A Good Time” of course.

I used to listen to this all the time last year. It got pushed out by new purchases. I still tend to listen to the post-Ralph albums a lot, but the first three of their albums have done a runner from my limited-storage-space phone long ago, which is a shame really, they deserve more attention. I’m pushing them back in now though. How can you argue with “Money” on a sunny day?

I’ve been listening to this constantly since its release, and so this listen here is just another go-round, rather than any attempt to appreciate an under-appreciated hidden gem. I’ve been constantly listening to it all year because its really good! …Even their absolutely shoddy live gig this time last year didn’t stop this being a good record in my eyes.

I enjoyed listening to it out in the sun today whilst chopping down (or rather trimming to acceptable tidiness, its not like I actually felled them with an axe) the trees surrounding my current accommodation, in the glorious sunshine. The title track and “Fall From Grace” are brilliant cheerful songs to hack trees by! (Although maybe I should’ve listened to Rush, now that I think about it… that’d be good, ey? I wonder if the neighbors would’ve got the joke?).

It took a long time to trim those trees. This was the second album I put on, because its not too-heavy for neighbors. I love this album, any excuse to listen to it is fine by me… even if my thumbs are covered in blisters afterwards! Good album. “Sleeping By Myself Tonight” is superb.

Man, I just never listen to this. I’ve owned it at least a decade, and I think I’ve listened to it fewer than twenty times in all that time (shame it wasn’t Somewhere In Time so I could use yet another “time” in that sentence), with about ten of those listens being made in the same month I bought it.

I love the title track (man, title tracks are usually great, aren’t they?) and “Be Quick Or Be Dead,” which I will always love for its Carmaggeddon 2 memories! (It was in that game’s soundtrack beside “The Trooper” and “Man On The Edge.”) Other than those two tracks however, I almost don’t even recognize over half of the record. I wasn’t even all that fond of it when I listened to it yesterday again either. I must try yet again tomorrow! Maybe it’s a grower, and I’ve never put enough time into it?

This album is fantastic. Its taken me years to think that though. A bit of backstory: I bought Cowboys’ and Vulgar’ on the same day on a Dublin holiday when I was about 12 or 13. I loved Vulgar instantly and forever. The high screams and weird production (and infuriating lack of snare drums on “Primal Concrete Sledge”) on Cowboys however, at the time made me think of it as being bad and cheesy and out-dated and un-Pantera, and for about two years afterwards I only liked the title track. (Title Tracks again, see?). Over the years I’ve liked more and more of it, and getting into thrash unlocked more of its charm, getting into Maiden unlocked yet more. Getting into Priest unlocked the final missing piece. Now I love every second of it… it just took me a while. A kid who mostly listens to Powerman 5000 and Limp Bizkit doesn’t have the palate suitable for “Heresy” or “Psycho Holiday” just yet. Well, it was worth the wait!

Another “I am listening to this all the time anyway” album. I’m surprised how much I’ve come to really enjoy this record. It’s also “unlocked” the band’s first two albums for me, and I can appreciate them as real music now, instead of just a clown-parade of druggy chancers and womanizers writing 80% filler and getting unnaturally lucky with a few hits, like I used to view them. Moving on…

Yet another “I am listening to this all the time anyway” album, like the above. This is my definite album of the summer. It will likely be my album of the year at this rate. Every listen and it gets better, just like Stalingrad did. I’ll be watching the free Blu Ray a lot over the rest of the year too. Good value. I’ve been avoiding new albums recently because I can get boxsets of albums for the same price as individual new albums, and about 5 cheap old albums for the price of one new album, so it just seems wasteful to buy new albums…. This one however was unarguable value for money considering how much enjoyment and use I got out of it!

When I first got the boxset of Dokken’s first five albums (well, four and a live album), I sort of overlooked this one a lot. I’m slowly rectifying that oversight. “Paris Is Burning” and “Live To Rock (Rock To Live)” are excellent jaunty Judas Priest-style Speed Metal tracks (although with a softer production, admittedly).

This still isn’t my favourite Dokken album, or one I’d share with any friends who don’t listen to this sort of thing to convert them, but it’s a nice enough album and worth my time.

This is a classic, everyone loves it. Its not hard to see why. Phil’s voice is excellent here, Pepper and Kirk’s riffs are really memorable and everyone loves a bit of Bower Power, that Bonham-esque groove he can inject songs with really putting the cherry on top.

Good songs (most of a Down setlist most times, ey?), great performances, faultless production… pretty good record. Its not even monotonous, there’s plenty of variety from the brief stunners like “Lifer” and “Hail To The Leaf” and then the acoustic “Jail,” for variety, yet further diversified by the unique genre-of-one in hit single “Stone The Crow” and then topped-off by the big weighty monolith of an album-closer (and live-favourite) “Bury Me In Smoke.”

Its just all good, and there’s a nice mix so you aren’t bored or wore-down. I just need to remind myself to listen to it as often as I listen to Pantera or C.O.C. I’ve been constantly hammering The Purple EP all year, or at least its highlights, so I’ve probably been getting enough Down overall that I didn’t notice the dip in NOLA plays, but Martin Popoff’s book just reminded me to go back to the reason I liked Down in the first place.

I listen to the title track (how many times with the title tracks?) and “Rock N Roll Rebel” all the time, and I have it on Vinyl mounted on my wall, and I listened to the whole record all the time for about a year after I got it… but I’ve noticed a massive decrease in listens recently. I’ve just put it on again (another Popoff inspired move) and noticed that apart from the aforementioned hits, I’ve forgotten most of this record, and there’ actually a lot more good moments on here than I’ve been giving it credit for recently, certainly since last Christmas I’ve not listened to it in full. Well, now I have once more, and it was entertaining. Not the best Ozzy album, but better than the two-tracks-only footnote that I’ve been treating it as! Also the bonus track “One Up The B Side” is great, despite its cheesy joke title.

I bought a set of the first two V.O.D. albums a while back, around the same time I bought the boxset of Life Of Agony albums (I remember mixing the two bands up because of their triple-word names with “of” in the center, their association with ‘90s American Hardcore, and both having tracks with “River” in the title. This “River” song has a guest appearance from Phil Anselmo, Life Of Agony’s didn’t.

I ended up becoming a real fan of the Life Of Agony material… but upon initial listen I wasn’t keen on V.O.D. much at all. Their albums seemed like an exhausting barrage of samey, brash, rough-around-the-edges violence. To be fair, that’s still true, but its more of a compliment than an insult. This album is full of absolutely brilliant tracks. Each one, in isolation, is a blow-away-the-cobwebs breath of fresh air… intense, threatening and very very lively. Their singer reminds me of Chimaira’s Mark Hunter a little… but a less melodic, more screamy version.

Highlights for me are “Jada Bloom,” “Twelve Steps To Nothing” and “Landslide.” I’m warming to this album, its just a bit exhausting all at once… they’re still a band I can only take in small doses.

Another Popoff inspiration. I bought this record around this time last year, wasn’t amazingly sold on it really, and kind of just listened to it in small doses here and there from then on, with decreasing frequency until its now mostly ignored altogether. I stuck it on yesterday and was really impressed, there’s a whole heap of stolen Anthrax, Megadeth and Overkill parts and apart from the slow, grungy tempos and Rob’s unusual voice, this is pretty much a nice Thrash album. “Thrust” and “Black Sunshine” are good. The only problem with the album is that the band seem a bit too relaxed, too calm, holding back a bit. V.O.D are too unhinged and aggressive and abrasive, put this is the opposite end of the spectrum… its very chilled out and softened-down. You can tell the songs are good though, it’d be cool to hear them covered by someone with a bit of energy. Perhaps V.O.D. could cover them and split the difference?

This album is associated with sunshine for me. I was listening to it in the wonderful sunshine in the zoo in Rotterdamn, and I listened to it today whilst going out on a long walk in the countryside while trying to put more of this healthy stuff into action and make the most of this last week away before its back to early 4am work mornings and grey city sludge. The whole album is so bright and clean and uplifting that really sunshine is the only environment in which you could take it seriously… you already need a big smile on your face before it even starts.

What about the record itself? I used to think it was pretty samey, pretty bland, and lacking in the x-factor of its more famous cousin Inhuman Rampage. Listening to it carefully for the first time today, I guess that’s only half true… there’s a little more to things here than I initially credited it with, and while it can wear a little thin all at once its pretty much an honest record with good intentions. Not soon to become a favourite, but worth a few more listens at least.

Ok. That’s enough for one article. I’ve dropped my thoughts on most of the albums I’ve been listening to in the last three days; I’ll leave discussions of Death, Carcass, Cro-Mags and Deicide to another time as I’m pretty sure most people will’ve stopped reading by now anyway.

Oh well, it stopped me from splashing out on Spiderman comic collections, Early ‘80s American Hardcore bands’ debut albums, Musician’s biographies (Five Finger Death Punch’s drummer has a book out!?) and all the live concert DVDs going at the minute (or indeed b-sides and bonus tracks to albums I have but haven’t got all the bonus material from.)

‘Til we meet again…

Get (Into) What You Paid For – Round 4: Episode 1 Day 7 (Part 1)

Hello and welcome to this fourth round of my “Get (Into) What You Paid For” challenge, in which I attempt (despite being an out of control, no discipline, shopaholic of sorts) to not buy anything for a month.

I also try and make this challenge easier by going back and paying more attention to what I’ve bought already, and try and get into more and therefore get my money’s worth.

Have you ever picked up five or six albums in one shopping session or received several videogames all at once for a birthday and then found that some products get used more than others? This series is designed to reappraise and finally get into those sort of underdog products.

JP – RoS

If I was going to break my challenge, what would cause me to do so?
Well, I’m damn tempted to but the new Judas Priest album, Redeemer Of Souls. I’ve read absolutely universal praise of it, and Judas Priest are one of the band’s I’ve listened to the most in the last four years. If its anywhere near as good as Angel Of Retribution I’ll love it. Most people say its measurably better than Angel Of Retribution. Sounds pretty good to me. Plus its topical and up-to-date, and I’ve been lost in the 80s a bit recently, and it would be nice to be up-to-date with something. I’ll get that feeling when my pre-oder of Accept’s Blind Rage arrives, but until then, I’m sort of out-of-the-loop with modern releases at the moment.

In the opposite direction of being up-to-date however, I was watching a Lynyrd Skynrd documentary this week and that put me in the mood to try out some Molly Hatchet and Black Oak Arkansas, and expand my Southern Rock collection further than solely Lynyrd Skynyrd and Blackfoot. This was compounded the next day when watching a Van Halen documentary that featured Jim Dandy (Black Oak Arkansas’ frontman) as a contributor (discussing press accusations that David Lee Roth stole his stage moves). Both of those guys have Original Album Series boxsets and I kind of want to pick those up… but boxsets are a dangerous game. I’m still in a boxset “get my money’s worth” mind-war with Thin Lizzy, Van Halen, Dream Theater, Faith No More, Foghat and Mountain (and to a lesser extent Motorhead and Saxon a bit).

VOD – BV

Bit of a left-field choice here, but I’m really tempted to buy Broken Valley by Life Of Agony. It’s the only album by them I don’t own yet, due to buying that Roadrunner Boxset, and I’ve been absolutely loving their first two albums these last few months. I’ve been really, really heavily leaning on tracks like “Damned If I Do,” “Bad Seed,” “Underground” and “Drained.” Their reunion put them back in the press and that reminded me of this missing album in my collection (I think there was an article saying they’ll not be making a new record so fans “better get used to Broken Valley”).

F – F&W

A fairly new “want” of mine is Free’s Fire And Water. Fairly new as in yesterday. There was a vintage music channel playing music videos on a TV in the background of where I was at yesterday. It was primarily showing videos of 80s pop bands like Duran Duran, Culture Club and Wham. Then out of nowhere; a Zepplinny, 70s-Sounding Hard Rock guitar comes in with charming production and suddenly I sit up and pay attention. It turns out to be “All Right Now” by Free, which is probably up there with “The Boys Are Back In Town” by Thin Lizzy and “Sunshine Of Your Love” by Cream as one of the most famous and frequently pub-covered songs in Rock Music, and yet I’d never really noticed it properly before. I was impressed. I’d like to hear a full album. Turn it from a “Smoke On The Water” into a “Machine Head” and find a few “Pictures Of Home”s… if you follow my meaning?

I’ve also been voraciously consuming Batman comics over this last year (in fact, August 2013 was when my good friend Paul bought me a load of Batman books for my birthday and in-so-doing kicked my casual “Ok, I’ll try some Batman” phase into an “I am a Batman fan” phase.) So I’d be tempted to buy just about any Batman tradepaperback I come into contact with. My current “top picks” to get are Ego, Odyssey, Black & White, Year 100, Dark Victory, Time & The Batman, Bruce Wayne The Return, Bruce Wayne Murderer? and all volumes of the New 52 Nightwing series.
When its released I want all volumes of Batman Eternal, Zero Year and I also want any stories where Jason Todd is Robin…. release some sort of retrospective please guys?

Anyway, enough about what could make me spend money, what’s been saving me money so far this month? What’s kept my hands busy and stopped by notorious spending habbits at bay?

M.C. – T.O.P

Well; Its August 7th, 2014 and I’ve currently managed to go the first week of the challenge without buying myself anything. Right before the challenge started, I picked up a copy of Motely Crue’s third studio album Theater Of Pain from a Charity Shop for £1.99, and that has pretty much kept me interested for a full week.

I didn’t expect much from this album to be honest. I thought it might be a bit rubbish. I’ve read bad reviews of it. I’ve read The Dirt (Crue’s biography book) and the album is slated in that book. I’ve watched Google Play’s Motley Crue documentary (see here) and singer Vince Neil rejects the album. It seems like it might be a bad product. A bit of a mistake. A bit like Kiss’ Music From The Elder Album.

But you know me, champion of the bad-album, lover of St Anger, contrary semi-hipster who always seems to love the album with the bad reviews (Ok. That’s an exaggeration; I often also dislike unpopular albums too, but whatever…). I thought to myself I’ll find a way to enjoy this album.

On first listen, this album was a mess. Opening with a slow doomy track, then into a cartoony cover-song (and I’ve never liked songs singing about School anyway), then a rock song and then a ballad. Its confused, its all over the place. I heard people say this album is just “some songs” and that “its not a party album” and that “they were too high on drugs and bereavement for Razzle to make a good album.”

Then I heard the songs “Use It Or Lose It” and “Louder Than Hell” and they just connected with me. Unarguably and instantly two of my favourite Motely Crue songs. So I realized there is definitely something going on here. I’ve been listening to it repeatedly, in different combinations and orders until I came across the perfect listening order:

Now its not a mess. Now it’s a party album! Now it is a well balanced set of rock songs with diversity but a steady sensible flow. It’s a journey. It’s a good record!

In this order, I’ve listened to and loved the album about a dozen times now. What a big difference that the running order makes. I recommend you try it out this way, it is a much better album.

I’ve also been listening to the rest of the band’s catalogue these last two weeks. In particular, Shout At The Devil is a good record, with “Red Hot,” “Bastard” “Looks That Kill” and the Title Track all being stand out moments.

I don’t much care for their debut apart from the fabulous “Live Wire” and “Piece Of Action” or even the mega famous Dr. Feelgood album all that much apart from its own Title Track and “Kickstart My Heart.” I don’t have Girls Girls Girls yet, so can’t make a judgement on that one, but I will explain that kind of the reason for all this Crue interest is because I’ve loved the single “Wildside,” ever since I saw Dwight enjoying it too much in The Office on my most recent re-viewing of the series in its entirety. (I’d heard it before, but that moment just made me reevaluate it.)

In honour of this new found acceptance of Motely Crue (band who I’ve really struggled to allow myself to like due to my disapproval of their sexism, drug abuse glorification, domestic violence denial, and general selfishness and rudeness) I’m going to list my five-favourite songs by the band, and all their contempories in my music library.

So consider this a Hair Metal/ Glam Metal / ‘80s Hard Rock special episode.

Motely Crue :
1. Louder Than Hell
2. Live Wire
3. Wild Side
4. Use It Or Lose It
5. Shout At The Devil

W.A.S.P :
1. I Wanna Be Somebody
2. The Torture Never Stops
3. Ballcrusher
4. Shoot From The Hip
5. Chainsaw Charlie

Twisted Sister :
1. I Wanna Rock
2. You Can’t Stop Rock N Roll
3. The Kids Are Back
4. Kill Or Be Killed
5. Love Is For Suckers

Quiet Riot :
1. Metal Health
2. Run For Cover
3. Scream And Shout
4. (We Were) Born To Rock
5. Sign Of The Times

Poison :
1. Look What The Cat Dragged In
2. Let Me Go To The Show
3. Play Dirty
4. Nothin’ Buta Good Time
5. Look But You Can’t Touch

Dokken :
1. When Lightning Strikes Again
2. ‘Til The Living End
3. Tooth And Nail
4. Live To Rock (Rock To Live)
5. Kiss Of Death

Bon Jovi
1. Bad Medicine
2. King Of The Mountain
3. You Give Love A Bad Name
4. Runaway
5. Born To Be My Baby

With only one album by Extreme and Europe, I don’t feel its fair to do them, but I’ll say that my favourite one song by each is “It (‘s A Monster)” and “On The Loose” respectively.

For each of these articles this time around, I’ll try drop a TOP 5s of a particular subgenre in there. It’ll give this round a unique feature, ey?

T.P.B

In other areas, I’ve been keeping busy by watching Trailer Park Boys on Mike Ladano’s recommendation, and absolutely loving it. Thanks Mike. Thanks Netflix. It’s a great show! – Not only for guest rockstar appearances from Sebastain Bach and Alex Lifeson, but for the superb sense of humour and brilliantly real life (in a way) nature of the show. Its not skinny Hollywood girls buying Porches. Its much more down to earth (although it does get too surreal at times to honestly call “realistic” in fairness, but you catch my drift).

The characters are really enjoyable, from humorously selfish and flawed, to ludicrously irrational and dysfunctional. Its hard to pick a favourite character because everyone has got something going for them… even minor characters like Ray would be the best character in some other shows.

In a more British mood, I’ve been watching the absolutely excellent Getting On. A British show about Hospital Nurses, very much in the style of (and featuring cast members, and written and directed by people from) The Thick Of It. Just like The Thick Of It was a really astute and well researched satire of the British political system, Getting On is basically the same show but about the NHS. Its fun though, because instead of some lazy slamming of the NHS and unfair complaints, its mostly just a comedy about flawed individuals and their own personal weaknesses interfering with their ability to do their job properly. Its not “This is why hospitals are bad”… its “How did this clown get a job in a hospital” and I appreciate that. Fair humour, that doesn’t play too much on the same old negative hospital stereotypes.

BS – I

What else? Just before the challenge started, I got a lend of and finished, and Platinumed the videogame Bioshock Infinite (my first attempt at, and success at Platinuming a game in two years, despite my previously huge interest in that area). The game? It is a masterpiece. Although in hindsight, in comparison to Bioshock 1 & 2, a lot of the gameplay depth, setting atmosphere and cool enemies are missing, but I absolutely loved the story and the effort and depth there. I sat and read practically everything written about it on the internet afterwards and was wowed by the fabulous artistic achievement that this game is.

I won’t go too much into it because of spoilers, but wow… what a brilliantly executed concept. And I love whoever online said that the fact that it is a game strengthens the point its trying to make and the effort went to by the creators to make a piece of art strengthened by the gaming platform. Bioshock as a series is absolutely one of my favourites. Each of the three games has had some flourish of genius or other.

New Slipknot

A few other thoughts then – There’s a new Slipknot song. Not the single, we have now learned, but rather a heavier mid-album track as a gift to the fans. We don’t know who’s drumming on it, although the internet thinks it might be Chris Adler from Lamb Of God or Jay Weinberg. It might even secretly be Joey and the whole thing is a publicity stunt… is that legal? It might be Clown or Chris taking up a full time drummer’s job.

We don’t know who is playing bass on it either. Lots of members of Slipknot also play bass so, probably they played on the studio version and someone else will play it live. Chris is also a bassist. Perhaps Chris is the new Bassist and Clown is the new drummer? That would be good.

Anyway, the song, The Negative One… kind of like when they debuted “New Abortion” before Iowa, or the All Hope Is Gone Title Track before that album, its not really a catchy single, it’s a deep-cut given unrealistic limelight.

It has an Iowa-esque approach to the production and mix, and the vocals are less melodic and Stone Sour-esque than on the previous two albums, and there is a lot more sampling and DJ scratching than the previous two albums as well. Other than that, what can be said? Not all that amazing. Its not “Wow, this is one of my favourite Slipknot songs.”

In fact, if I listed all the Slipknot songs that were better than it, it would be most of the Slipknot songs. But whatever… early days yet. I hope, on one level, that the album is in this general direction…you know, far away from Stone Sour. On the other hand, “Dead Memories” is a better song than this so I’ll take a more commercial Slipknot so long as its good. I’d rather have good music in a commercial style than dull music in a good style. I will give it this though… the additional percussion in it is really fun. Especially in headphones. The mix on the final version is a lot better than in that initial stream too. Maybe that, or maybe its the same version but my speakers are better here than where I first heard it. Also, maybe its a grower. I don’t think “Everything Ends” or “The Shape” blew me away on first listen but I sure as heck like them now.

Metallica had a similar new song a while ago and I didn’t blog about it, but the feelings I had for it are similar. Its in a good style but not super-special in and of itself.

Another quick observation… Green Day totally and massively stole vocal patterns from “On With The Show” and “Merry-Go-Round” on American Idiot album tracks. Seriously, give it a listen!

Buying Round Up:

Here’s a quick list, and series of thoughts, on all the blog-related purchases I’ve made in the last while. I haven’t had time to give them all their own articles yet, so I’m going to give them all a short round-up here:

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List Of Hair Metal/Glam Metal Songs That Are Sort Of Similar To Speed Metal Songs:

When you think of Hair Metal (also known as Glam Metal) (Also known as Rock Music from the 80s that does not fall into a Metal Category at all according to some people) you usually think of music that sounds either full of synths and way too much reverb, or else big ballads.

Or, if you have heard a bit more of Hair Metal (say, Poison’s “Nothing But A Good Time” for example), then you think of it as a sly mixture between Kiss, Aerosmith, Van Halen and AC/DC riffs and vocal patterns, and sometimes sprinkled with Queen-esque backing vocals.

There’s another side to it though, that people who care about “Metal-ness,” or “Metal Credibility” might enjoy but might miss out on due to thinking its all big ballads and synthy overkill. A side that’s much more in the spirit of Iron Maiden and Judas Priest. A lot of the time, Hair Metal bands who started in the earlier half of the 80s rather than the later half will actually have the “Metal” in their sound that explains why the word Metal is in the phrase “Hair Metal” (Or Glam Metal, if you think the word “Hair” is too insulting).

Here is a list of such songs:

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FIRST IMPRESSIONS Volume 71: Poison – Look What The Cat Dragged In

FIRST IMPRESSIONS Volume 71: Poison – Look What The Cat Dragged In

FIRST IMPRESSIONS Volume 71: Poison – Look What The Cat Dragged In

Hello, and welcome to my Blog. Why is it called KingcrimsonBlog, the official Blog of Kingcrimsonprog?. Good question; It is called that, because I am called Kingcrimsonprog (or Gentlegiantprog). Well, I’m not. I’m called Jimmy. But, I’m called either Kingcrimsonprog or Gentlegiantprog on most websites and forums. (You know, in the way you have to choose a name or “net-handle” when you register?).

Back when this Blog was first devised, it was sort of a hub “digest” of all my various internet output, under one easy “roof.” So people could then tell that my things were not stolen from elsewhere on the internet, I kept my net-handle in the title. The name of my net-handle was simply chosen because I enjoy the Prog band King Crimson (and Gentle Giant) and is not in fact my real name. Forget about the name. Imagine its called “Music Nerd Blog” instead. You’ll get the idea.

I’ve been obsessing about music since about the year 2000. Over this time I’ve bought what must now be nearly 1,000 albums, and heard hundreds more through friends, relatives, streaming services and whatever else. I’ve also watched over a decade’s worth of music videos and heard countless individual songs on the radio, free covermounted CDs, websites and whatever else. All that, as well as read years and years worth of music magazines and websites.

I’m a nerd. Basically. Only, instead of James Bond or Vintage Clothing, its Music that I obsess about. Lots of people are nerds and don’t even realize it. Sometimes its obvious; trainspotting, stamp collecting etc. Sometimes its less obvious due to presentation. Some (make that many) football fans’ depth of knowledge about players and transfer costs and club histories would make many tram-enthusiasts seem normal by comparison. The amount of information that some people know about Reality-TV celebrities and their sex-lives would easily overpower my knowledge of bands, or the most dedicated historian and their knowledge of French Military Tactics. Everyone has a thing they get nerdy about, whether or not they realize or admit that it is similar to the more famous nerdy things like Star Wars. I don’t particularly like Football or Reality TV or French Military Tactics. I like Heavy Metal music. That’s my one thing. That’s what this Blog is all about.

Welcome to my First Impressions series of articles too, incidentally. In this series I (or sometimes my friends, or readers) pick an album for each entry that I will listen to for the first time. I then write in depth about what I know about that album or the artist that created it and the genre and subgenre to which they belong, before describing the experience of listening to it in real time, in a sort of semi-stream-of-consciousness way intended for entertainment purposes. I also enjoy writing reviews of albums, but when I write reviews my goal is to be helpful and provide you with information with which to aide your decision about whether to try out an album or not. When I write a First Impressions article however my goal is purely to entertain the reader, explore how much I know about music and be my own psychiatrist in the process.

I may go into some very specific detail and assume you have heard everything I’ve ever heard and perceived everything in the manner I’ve perceived it, and call out very specific sections of music and draw comparisons between things that the casual listener may find completely unrelated. Don’t worry, most of these songs are on Youtube and most of the terminology is on Wikipedia and Urban Dictionary anyway, so if there’s anything that goes over your head, you can always get clarification in a second web-browser-tab (or ask about it in the comments).

According to the aim of the series, the albums are considered by the public and music critics knowledgeable about the subject to be Classic albums within Rock and Metal, or at least within their own Subgenres. Classic albums that I’ve somehow missed out on, despite my nerdly need to hear and understand almost every piece of recorded Metal music ever.

If you have an album that you’d like to read a KingcrimsonBlog First Impressions article about, please suggest it in the comments, I’m game, I’ll give anything a try.

So that’s the preamble out of the way, on to the article:

This is the seventy-first entry in the series and this time I’ll be listening to the debut album by the American Glam Metal band Poison, 1986’s Look What The Cat Dragged In. (1986 – Which was the year of Peace Sells, Reign In Blood and Master Of Puppets).

I’d like to think I was done with talking about Glam by now. I’ve covered it in previous FI articles on the subject of W.A.S.P , Quiet Riot, Motely Crue, Extreme, Twisted Sister , W.A.S.P again and more recently, Dokken.

Maybe I’m just not done with Glam yet. Maybe there’s something left to say, because I haven’t properly given Posion a detailed scrutiny. I remember a friend saying that even as a fan of Glam, Poison would be an embarrassing band to admit to liking.

I like the sound of that. It seems like it might be an interesting experience. A band that are too over-the-top looking, a band that are considered style over substance by other style-over-substance artists, a band that watered their sound down even more than the rest. A band that is more symbolically pop-with-guitars than Glam METAL. I remember a video of Corey Taylor telling a story of picking up this album to see the “hot chicks” on the cover, only to discover that they were men. That sort of says all I’m going to bother with about how the band looks.

I also know their music videos are stupid. To be fair, almost all music videos are either stupid or else just dull. It took me quite a while to stop judging bands based on music videos, so if you saw one and it put you off the band I completely understand, but I’m going to go on with the article under the premise of “only the music matters, the image and videos don’t change whether the album is good or not.”

I remember my initial point of giving Glam a fair chance was the promise of that Metal part, that Judas Priest sounding Metal that hid in the early material of W.A.S.P and the deep cuts of Twisted Sister. The idea that a band who people write off can sound almost indistinguishable from Overkill’s debut makes me smile a little.

That’s not going to be the case here though is it? This is the other end of the spectrum as far as I know.

Lets find out.

[Play]

‘Cry Tough’ opens up with a nice crowd-friendly drum part people could clap along with that reminds me of Green Day’s ‘Wake Me Up When September Ends’ only shone through the filter of a sunny 80s buddy comedy. Then a mixture of shimmering arpeggios low in the mix, slow distorted guitar chords and a sort of pop-punky bass line. The vocals are quite reminiscent of 80s female pop stars. It also reminds me of Bryan Adams for some reason.. Its about as heavy as the start of ‘Sweet Child Of Mine,’ so its still definitely Rock music, but its not sounding very Priest-esque yet.

I wonder if Poison were quite influential on Emo and Pop Punk bands. Not in a snarky way, because those things are all seen as ‘bad’ by certain vocal minorities online, but because I hear some genuine sonic similarities.

Its interesting that people online can be so venomous towards Pop Punk, Emo, Nu Metal and Hair Metal, but linking back to the James Gill “You Know All The Words” in a Rock-Club-scenario argument, I was in a Rock Club last night, and people most definitely knew all the words to Green Day and Sum 41 and My Chemical Romance and Paramore and Limp Bizkit and Linkin Park and seemed to be having a wonderful time of singing along to all of them, whether they were dressed in Pantera t-shirts or Death t-shirts or Burzum t-shirts.

I guess in a way its redundant to keep pointing out the same hypocrisies over and over again, and to write “Hey a lot of people actually like bands that are quite clearly well liked” when to most people its probably obvious, but it’s a topic that interests me a lot. To my mind, the way I perceive the world, from what I’ve read it seems like almost everyone hates Linkin Park, Sum 41 and Poison, but quite clearly this is the opposite of the case. Its probably because they’re so loved by so many people that online grumps want to deny their quality and popularity and endeavor to convince impressionable and easily-fooled people like me that no-one likes these bands.

I wonder, if the internet had have been bigger back in the 1980s-90s, would the whole Black Metal Helvete-scene thing have happened, or would having an outlet to simply troll Motley Crue and later Nirvana online have stopped all those guys having such a bad attitude towards commercial music in their day to day lives? Furthermore, when Euronymous and Count Grishnack got drunk, did they happily sing all the words to ‘Talk Dirty To Me’?

Its an interesting thought. I’m not a psychologist, and I don’t know enough about human nature to give you an actual insight, but the question is mildly interesting at any rate.

‘I Want Action’ opens up with just vocals, then an intro kicks in, then there’s a bouncy song which unfolds which is almost indistinguishable from Dookie-era Green Day, to my ears anyway, with a little Rock N Roll part thrown in there too. There’s a very pleasing and fun-to-the-ears guitar solo. The production reminds me of Appetite For Destruction but the music reminds me of Green Day. It ends the way you’d end live, with extra long fills and that sort of thing. That aspect reminds me of The Darkness, but not sonically, just in spirit.

‘I Won’t Forget You’ is a sort of ballad, or at least a very soft rock track, it reminds me of The Saw Doctors and The Proclaimers. The production makes it sound really perfect in a way. Its not particularly anything, but its good anyway… like the movie Adventureland. Its not the most emotional, humourous, or interesting film, even among its peer films, but its still good anyway.

‘Play Dirty’ opens up in a more energetic Rock fashion, it reminds me a bit of The Darkness’ ‘Growing On Me’ due to the rhythm of the main riff. This is probably the closest to Guns N Roses or Skid Row that this album has got so far. There’s a bit more attitude to it. The on/off nature of the chorus, combined with the reverby sing-along vocal makes me think of ‘Rock You Like A Hurricane.’ This is quite an enjoyable, fun, 80s Rock song. Kind of the same sort of fun as Quiet Riot’s ‘Metal Health.’

I think so far, Posion are a whole heap more slick, professional and impressive than Motely Crue. More talented as musicians, better songwriters and easier on the ears.

I also think they are more original in a strange way, because you can’t hear any Kiss or Aerosmith or Judas Priest in their sound at all. Maybe though, I just don’t know the band’s they’re ripping off. Even so; They’ve also got heaps of personality. This isn’t just another Glam band. There’s audible personality here. Like Limp Bizkit, even if the-

Woops. Spoke too soon. The Title Track comes in next, its actually quite a Metallic song compared to everything else so far. I guess there is a bit of Priest-influence after all. Well, you’re probably sick of me making Limp Bizkit analogies all the time anyway. Hey. This is actually a good song! Its simple but catchy. I wouldn’t be embarrassed listening to this song in a mix of Ozzy, Judas Priest and Gun N’ Roses songs. Interestingly, it even references Sin After Sin in the lyrics.

‘Talk Dirty To Me’ follows. I used to hate this song when I first heard it in Guitar Hero 3, which I also initially hated, but darn it if they didn’t both really grow on me. This is another very Pop Punky song. That main riff is even quite original-punky in a way. I’m not saying it sounds like The Ramones, but it does remind me of people who like The Ramones practicing guitar. I have a vague memory of a plot point in an episode of Scrubs surrounding a patient wanting to listen to this song.

The guitar solo here is a lot of fun, I think I quite like CC Deville. I’d rather listen to his guitar solos than Kerry King’s or Andreas Kisser’s. Yes I know that looses me a million Metal-points.

‘Want Some, Need Some’ comes next. It reminds me a bit of the Title Track but its a little slower and with a less Metallic feel. The chorus reminds me of Motely Crue slightly. It’s a fair enough song. The guitar solo is less musical this time though.

‘Blame It On You’ is the quintessential, stereotype, LA Stripper music Rock song. I mentioned this in relation to some songs on Dr. Feelgood. There’s a certain, specific way of writing bouncy beats with clunky bass guitar tones that connects a lot of Glam bands together. It’s sort of present in Mr. Brownstone.

‘Number One Bad Boy’ burst out confidently as if it was an extension of the previous song, the production here and the way some of the vocals work remind me of Motely Crue even though the actual vocal tone is closer to Twisted Sister. You know what it also reminds me of? The slightly Glam touches hidden in there on Alice In Chain’s Facelift. The bits with the guitar solo distantly remind me of Cowboys From Hell era Pantera, but that’s probably more to do with the fact that there’s an absence of Rhythm Guitar during the solos more than anything else.

‘Let Me Go To The Show’ comes on next, opening with a guitar solo. It’s a fast, fun, song with clean yet punky energy. It reminds of when Guns N’ Roses cover punk songs like ‘Attitude’ and ‘New Rose.’ There’s a bit in the middle that reminds me of ‘Ballroom Blitz’ due to the snare drum part. In one way it’s a very good song. In another, all the different parts don’t really gel together well. Maybe it was longer and the producer got them to delete a lot of the bridging parts so as to save the spirit of the song.

Ok. That’s it over.

You know what? I can see why people would be embarrassed to listen to Poison, but I would be a bold-faced liar if I said I did not enjoy this record. Admittedly; It doesn’t satisfy much of my Metal receptors, but it’s a whole heap of well-produced, personality-filled fun that reminds me of being a teenager and listening to Green Day for the first time.

I guess I’m not going to convince many Mayhem fans to give Poison a fair chance, but nobody really expects me to. Oh well, I’ll have more fun with this in the coming months than I will with Des Mysteries Dom Sathanis. I don’t really mind if that makes me look silly to the people who found this website for the Cannibal Corpse, Zyklon, Emperor or Melechesh entries, at least I’m enjoying myself.

Instead of beating the same old dead horse for yet another time, I’ll finish with a completely unrelated point. Kiss’ ‘Shout Mercy’ has become one of my favourite songs. I really recommend everyone listen to it. I was walking around Asda with my headphones in one day recently, trying to find powdered milk, and I suddenly stopped, wondering why I was having an absolutely brilliant time. The reason was because Kiss’ ‘Shout Mercy’ was playing. I don’t care if the lyrics are about being so good in bed that your partner has to loudly urge you to stop such is the intensity of their orgasm, because damn it, that is one great combination of musical parts. It also harks back to everything that was great about 70s Kiss but the weird swing feel of the main bit sounds unlike anything the band ever did before, so it’s a real satisfying track because of its mixture of giving you what you want and being creative at the same time too.

If you just skimmed through Kiss’ most recent album Monster and didn’t really play it all that often, take a moment and just set this one song aside, turn it up, and pay attention. You’ll thank me for it.

No, I guess its got nothing to do with Poison other than the fact that the lyrics are about sex, as are most of Poison’s, but its on my mind and I’m writing a blog, so I’ve added it in here. Its happened.

You want a song to put you in a good mood? ‘Shout Mercy’ by Kiss. To be fair, ‘Talk Dirty To Me’ has put me in a good mood too. Listen to that too if you like. The only other song that’s put such a big smile on my face today is when I heard Opeth’s ‘Harlequin Forest’ for the first time and that huge part at 7.32 comes in. That is a seriously cool part.

Oh, I mentioned enjoying Opeth, do I win some Metal-points back?

Cheers. G’bye for now.

Get (Into) What You Paid For: Vol. 3. Day 52 – The Memory Remains

Its day 52 of my third Get (Into) What You Paid For challenge. There’s ten days left. Even though it got extended to be an extra month long, I’ve been adhering to the challenge and haven’t broken it yet thanks to the Christmas gifts I discussed last time, which have taken the urge to buy myself stuff away for a while. I’ve been working through it. I’ve watched Sound City, I’ve read Joey Shithead’s autobiography, I’ve been heavily listening to Porcupine Tree’s Deadwing and Tesseract’s new album. I’ve been playing Arkham Origins. The entertainment part of my life is pretty well serviced.

I’ve also finished the comics that I got for Christmas from my friend Magnum, and am in the mood for more. Which leads us to the part of the article where I discuss what I would buy if I wasn’t on the challenge not to buy things:


I remember when I first planned to buy comics, I wanted to read three stories. Year One, Knightfall and No Man’s Land. This was due to reading the Wikipedia page for The Dark Knight Rises movie.

I got given a lend of Year One by my friend Magnum straight away. I have never gotten around to reading the other two. After having played the three Arkham games, and just recently finishing the campaign mode of Arkham Origins, I really want to get around to reading them now.

There’s two problems with that though… first off, postage and packaging. Second off, Knightfall is three books and No Man’s Land is five books. So; in order to read these two stories, I need to buy eight books, and eight sets of postage and packaging. You add them to your basket and then think…oooh that’s a bit too much for me right now, and then the postage comes on top and it’s like…hmmm, definitely not now.


The same thing happens in a value for money way. I have a weird notion that I want to buy the first three Poison albums, but for under £1 each. Which is possible on amazon at times, but then the postage for three albums is about six quid, and then suddenly its not worth it anymore. I worry that it’ll be completely terrible but I’m kind of fascinated. I think that people will feel the same way about Limp Bizkit in a few years (Nu Metal is very much the Hair Metal of my generation and Emo is the Nu Metal of the next generation after me, and I’m sure there’ll be some Dubstep-infused-Post Hardcore movement starting to take off soon that will be the one for today’s twelve year olds).


Y’know what else I’d like. More Son’s Of Anarchy. I watched the first four seasons which are available on Netflix over the Christmas break and now I want to see the next three seasons. At first I wasn’t actually keen on the show, but I really got into it and now I really want to see more. I can’t decide if I should buy a boxset or wait until its all finished and buy a complete set or wait until more goes up on Netflix. I don’t know if that’s a thing that happens. Is it? Tell me in the comments if that’s likely to occur.

But I’m trying not to buy those things; so instead, I’ll use the things I already have. Money for comics and campy Hair Metal songs would be much better spend on rent, electricity, food and other essentials, right?

With that in mind, here is the section where I discuss the things I listened to that I already owned:

So onto the aforementioned listening-for-distraction stakes; I’ve put on Fair To Midland’s proper debut album (or third album if you count independent releases), the lengthily titled Fables From A Mayfly: What I Tell You Three Times Is True.

I got their follow-up to this, Arrows & Anchors because the internet buzz was that if you liked Rishloo or Coheed & Cambria, then you should check out Fair To Midland. I do like Rishloo and Coheed & Cambria. I like them a lot. So… I checked out Arrows & Anchors and really enjoyed it. It took me a while to get around to picking up this one.

Its less instant than Arrows & Anchors. Its less driving, less powerful. It takes a lot more time to soak in. Its an album you have to give a lot more time to, in order to get the same sort of return back from it. But the return is definitely there to be had.

It feels a lot longer than it is though, at forty-eight minutes it feels like its about an hour and a half in duration. Not because its bad or anything. I guess, in a way, its kind of dense. Not Neurosis dense. But still… there’s a lot to it.

I like this album a lot, but its more of an whole-album-in-one-sitting affair than the other one, it’s the kind of thing where you have to put on the whole record and pay attention to it, rather than knowing the song titles and having a favourite song. Its just as good, but its less fun, if that makes any sense.

I’ve also been re-listening to Kreator’s Pleasure To Kill album a lot recently. Its one of those albums that you always read is absolutely brilliant, but which I’ve sometimes had a bit of a grudge against.

I know that Kreator’s next three albums are brilliant, well-written catchy Thrash records with many parts that sound like Forbidden, Anthrax and Megadeth and not just grim, heavier versions of ‘Chemical Warfare’ by Slayer on repeat. For some reason though, that’s exactly how I find myself thinking about Pleasure To Kill. I think its just a constants stream of d-beats over one buzzy riff and some ’80s death-vocals, with no variety.

I think this may be because the kind of people who told me Sodom’s Obsessed By Cruelty or Sepultura’s Morbid Visions were good, were the same people who recommend this. (Two albums which I find incredibly dull, repetitive and not to my tastes, by the way). Naturally, I’m suspicious of it. It also doesn’t help that the first song (excluding the intro) is the sort of high tempo, frantic pounding sort of thing that confirms this suspicion. Also, its just one of those things were you made your mind up about it once, years ago, and it never occurred to you to challenge the notion until just now.

Recently though, I’ve been listening to it over and over, and noticing parts that don’t sound like Obsessed By Cruelty. Lots and lots of parts. Over half the damn record. It’s a really good, creative Thrash album with lots of tempo changes, breakdowns, Anthraxy parts and all that good stuff that the next three Kreator albums that I don’t write-off all have.

Woops.

Oh well; at least I know now. I paid for it, it’s a good job it turned out to be good. Even if I was late to realize it.

Maybe I’ll go back and listen to Obsessed By Cruelty and find out its just as fresh and fun as Among The Living and that this whole relentless pounding thing was all a bad dream.

You know what else I did? I listened to Dark Side Of The Moon again. It seems like an obvious thing to do, but I can’t actually remember the last time I listened to it. When I first got into Pink Floyd I listened to them so, so, so much, and watched their DVDs so, so much, that it kind of feels like, I don’t need to listen to them again sometimes. Like, I’ve listened to them so much its just imprinted in my brain forever and its redundant to listen to them any more.
Its kind of such an obvious thing to do, that I don’t even think of it anymore. Should I listen to Pink Floyd? – Well, are you alive? – Yes, I am alive – Then of course you should listen to Pink Floyd. In fact, you are probably already listening to Pink Floyd, just pay more attention.

Maybe all the Porcupine Tree and Riverside had been filling my Floydism receptors in my brain and I didn’t realize I was missing any. Anyway; I remembered to listen to them again.

What a good album. You don’t need me to tell you that. Nobody ever has to say it again. Yes; this and Led Zeppelin 4 are good albums. We know.

I enjoyed myself. I must remember to listen to Pink Floyd again. Sure, it may be for the thousandth time, but its always going to be good.

You know everything I just said about Pink Floyd? Well yeah, that again… only for Pantera. This album is so good, so fundamental to what I like about music, has so many of my favourite songs on it, that I absolutely forget to listen to it.

I’m not sure whether this, Master Of Puppets or Reign In Blood would be considered the Dark Side’ of Metal by the public, but for me, its definitely up there. I was going to start listing the things I like about this record, but it ended up being every single one of the things about this record. The only thing at all wrong with this is that ‘By Demons Be Driven’ has one chorus too many. Otherwise this is a flawless, perfect album. Every riff, every solo, every vocal line. The charming production. The performances. The variety. Its all exactly what I want out of music.

How good is the And Justice For All-sounding clean bit at the start of Hollow? How good is the heavy bit of Hollow? How good are Phil’s clean vocals on This Love? How good are Phil’s grunts, growls and screams on Fucking Hostile and Regular People? How good are the drum fills? The guitar solos?

I guess the take home message is, remember to listen to your favourite albums. They are your favourite albums, remember?

What is fame and what is Metal?

I’ve had a lot of free time this week to sit and read blogs. Some of them have really got me thinking. I read a list questioning which are the most famous Metal Songs and most famous Metal Bands. Generally; I love these sorts of things. But then you knew that already, didn’t you?. I read dozens and dozens of these sorts of lists, on blogs and in Magazines and on Rate Your Music or whatever else.

The thing I’ve noticed in dozens of them is that, there’s a sort of mythical set of perfect answers. Some of answers of course are pretty hard to disagree with; Metallica, Iron Maiden and Ozzy Osbourne for example. Ask everyone on a bus in the middle of Manchester to name as many Heavy Metal bands as they can think of, and I reckon those bands would come up quite a lot.

The thing is though, there’s quite a few other names that will regularly come up on the hypothetical average-list that are either controversial among metal fans as to whether or not they actually count as being metal or else are dubious as to how famous they actually are.

This isn’t necessarily a harsh criticism of metal fans and list-makers, but it does raise some interesting points that I think are worth stopping and thinking about. So; when considering who are the most famous Metal bands and Metal songs, you’ve got to ask yourself two questions. What is fame, and What is Metal?

Just a quick thought: Twisted Sister and Motely Crue are probably more famous than Bathory or Mercyful Fate. Bon Jovi are probably more famous than that. Limp Bizkit, Korn and Slipknot probably are too.

Machinehead, Avenged Sevenfold, Disturbed and Bullet For My Valentine are probably all more famous than Queensryche and Celtic Frost nowadays too.

I say “probably” because there’s really no way of knowing. Fame isn’t really a quantifiable concept, its more of an informed perception. We all know that Coca Cola is probably more famous than Only Fools And Horse, but we can’t really prove it on an individual level without gathering gigantic, unrealistic amounts of information that none of us could really be bothered to gather. To actually know for certain you would have to ask everyone on earth if they had heard of each, and then record and compare the answers. You would also have to know that they weren’t lying and that nothing was altering the results.

There’s another issue. The silent majority. You know when you go to a concert and its absolutely full. Think of how many people attend Download Festival every year, and then how many attend a single Motorhead concert. There’s more at Download.

Why does that matter? Well; There are so many people who are casual in their interest of Metal. People who don’t dress as Metal fans, don’t blog about it, don’t talk about it at work, but do know every word to System Of A Down’s Toxicity album. You can look at a Chemistry student who has no indicators of being a Metal fan and who does talk to you about a dubstep song they heard at the weekend, but they actually absolutely loves Disturbed and Bullet For My Valentine and just didn’t bring it up. You can find a girl in a nightclub listening to indie bands who will surprisingly be completely able to drunkenly sing all the lyrics of ‘Run To The Hills’ at you upon request. You’ll find people posting about how much they love pop stars on facebook and when you go into their bedroom there is a huge poster of Zack Wylde.

What I’m getting at, there’s a heck of a lot of people who listen to Metal that you wouldn’t necessarily expect. More than the readership of Metal Hammer Magazine, more than the crowd at your local sold-out mid-October Down concert. There’s hundreds of thousands of people who don’t even consider themselves a Metal fan that could tell you who Lemmy, James Hetfield and Corey Taylor are just from a photograph. My own mother could. Yours probably could too.

So. When we ask ourselves who are the most famous Metal bands; we need to ask “famous to who?” – because I’m pretty sure the average drunk stroppy teenage girl taking ecstasy tablets when asked to name ten heavy metal bands are more likely to identify Slipknot than Venom.

If you played somebody Helloween’s “Keeper Of The Seven Keys,” Judas Priest’s “Painkiller,” Pantera’s “Walk,” Limp Bizkit’s “Nookie,” Motely Crue’s “Girls, Girls, Girls” and Europe’s “The Final Countdown” I’m pretty sure more people can identify the last two or three than the first two. There may be a few generational differences, and there may be a bit of bias in the form of people not wanting to identify bands that they dislike (human nature, its annoying aint it?) but I recon more human beings know the answers to the less Metal-respectable bands on that list.

The easy way around that it to choose who you want “fame” to apply to. OK. Say, we only count people who have at one time owned a copy of Reign In Blood and have attended at least one Metallica concert? More of them will probably still know Marilyn Manson than King Diamond. More of them could identify “Welcome To The Jungle” than “Pull Me Under” by intro alone, because its still more famous overall, even if you are a serious Metalhead. Because you don’t live your entire life in a Metal-bubble.

Well, we’ve considered what fame actually means now.
But hold on a second. What even is Metal?

Are Europe a Metal band? Well, some people say they are a Hair Metal band. Hair Metal is a type of Metal. Therefore by that logic, they are indeed a Metal band. Not so fast though; Some people say Europe are a hard rock band. Some people say they are a Pop band.

Are Led Zeppelin a Heavy Metal band? A heck of a lot of people would say yes. A heck of a lot of people would say no. What about Deep Purple. Watch any worthwhile documentary about Heavy Metal and there’ll be talk of Deep Purple. That being said, nowadays most people on the street would call them “classic rock” rather than “heavy metal” even though the actual term was applied to bands like Zeppelin and Purple and AC/DC for years and years. So are they Metal or aren’t they? They themselves might call themselves “Rock n Roll” but so does Ozzy Osbourne and even Motorhead. If “In The Name Of Tragedy” by Motorhead is just Rock n Roll then I’ve seriously got to start checking out Buddy Holly.

Ok. Well what if you decide that Zeppelin aren’t Metal but Black Sabbath are. What about Queen. You go listen to “Dead On Time” and “Son And Daughter” by Queen and tell me with a straight face that it isn’t as Metallic or Powerful as “The Wizard” by Black Sabbath.

How about if we decide that the first ever Metal album is “Sad Wings Of Destiny” then? What after that is still Metal? Are Metallica? Are Helloween? Are Pantera? Are Machine Head? Are Slipknot? Are Bring Me The Horizon? Are Cannibal Corpse? Are Korpiklaani? Are Emperor? Are Limp Bizkit?

You can say Limp Bizkit aren’t because the vocals are not like Judas Priest and there’s an extra instrument (the DJ). Well, Cannibal Corpse’s vocals are very, very different to Judas Priest’s and Korpiklaani have extra instruments (Violins and Accordions).

I’ll admit some Limp Bizkit songs sound nothing like Metal. Ballads, and songs with electronic drums and effects and no distortion. What about Black Sabbath’s “FX” “Fluff” “Laguna Sunrise” “Changes” and “E5150” ? What about Judas Priest’s “Epitaph,” “Last Rose Of Summer” or “Love You To Death”? Ballads, songs with no distortion and incorporation of electronics on some songs.

Even at that, some classic tracks by Metal’s originators (which weren’t intros, experiments or ballads, but just normal songs) are still less-Metal than some Hair Metal and Nu Metal songs. I’d wager Limp Bizkit’s “Gimme The Mic” is much more Metal than Black Sabbath’s “Am I Going Insane?” or “Solitude” or even “Behind The Wall Of Sleep.”

Going the other way. I think that Korn’s “Blind” is closer to the sound and spirit of the original Black Sabbath tracks than Cannibal Corpse’s “Frantic Disembowelment” does. Hell, I think Twisted Sister sound a thousand times closer to the sound of Judas Priest than Darkthrone do.

Then there’s the people who don’t think Metalcore bands are Metal, either because of catchy clean choruses, or because of the incorporation of parts of Hardcore. Well, Chaos AD is incredibly Hardcore Influenced. Anthrax and Nuclear Assault were Hardcore influenced. Are they no-longer Metal?
Helloween and Stratovarius have some of the catchiest, cleanest choruses going, so are they no-longer Metal?

The thing is though? Who can really say? Metal-ness isn’t a fact. Its an opinion. Its a negotiation for consensus.

Half of the people who say something is not Metal but something else have no clear, quantifiable, non-contradict-able reason why. Its either just that they don’t like the band and have mistaken their own opinion with fact, or that its not something that can be definitively and incontrovertibly proven in the first place. There is no mathematical definition of Metal. Some people think death growls preclude you from being Metal, just read all the reviews of Children Of Bodom by Yngwie Malmsteen fans from the 80s who demand melodic falsetto singing. These people will swear until they are blue in the face that “cookie monster vocals” are the opposite of Heavy Metal. Try telling that to the audience at Hole In The Sky or Bloodstock festival though, they’ll give you a swift and unpleasant rebuttle more likely than not.

At the end of the day, there are people who think Krokus and AC/DC are Metal and that Limp Bizkit and Deicide aren’t. There are people who think that Immortal and Pig Destroyer are Metal but Poison and Quiet Riot aren’t. Heck, until about three years ago even I called pre-Dio Black Sabbath was just classic rock and not Metal.

What is and isn’t Metal is up to your own interpretation, apparently. Except Iron Maiden, nobody has ever said Iron Maiden aren’t Metal. Lemmy says Motorhead aren’t Metal but at least Steve Harris calls Maiden a Heavy Metal band. There’s at least comfort in knowing that whatever else in this world is up for debate, Iron Maiden are undisputed a Metal band (Although you could mistake “Prodigal Son” for a Boston or Rush song if you weren’t paying attention).

So. I guess where I’m going with this is that, there is an element of what the dedicated Metal fans want and indeed expect to be the most famous Metal music. It is based partly on the personal taste of a few Magazine writers, partly on actual consensus and partly on a self fulfilling prophecy of what we’re continuously told. The list seems to cover one arbitrary point of view and one arbitrary period in time. It isn’t full inclusivity nor is it completely strict and based only on true original Heavy Metal. Its often after the first Heavy Metal Bands go reclassified to “Classic Rock” but before other subgenres became popular.

I mean, I can’t tell for certain, but I’m pretty sure more people know and care about Bullet For My Valentine and Slipknot than have ever cared about Venom. But most people who actually like music to the point of making lists don’t want that to be the case.

Similarly, I think that year on year, Deep Purple, AC/DC and Led Zeppelin gain more new fans than Venom do. But we’ve all decided that they don’t count. For some reason. That is not particularly logical or fair.

Then there’s the really commercial bands like Linkin Park and Bon Jovi. Almost (not necessarily if you’re being pedantic, there have been flops, but you know what I’m getting at) by definition of being commercial, more people will know a band. A huge amount of us decide that if a band are too commercial, they aren’t Metal anymore. Why is that? Part of it may be based in truth, but again, part of it seems to just be based on what we want.

Take home message; when we ask ourselves which Metal songs, albums or artists are the most famous, I guess you’ve just got to ask whether or not they are Metal, or who you are being famous too that counts for the purposes of the list. You could spend years aggregating every list and reference to bands in every magazine, videogame, radio-show, podcast and television programme ever made and still only have a small, biased sample of a few people’s impressions of which bands were the most famous. You could count every Youtube view and LastFm scrobble ever recorded and still ultimately not know what’s in people’s heads or even who’s heads to look in.

After you to went all that effort to find the correct numbers, there’d still be debate on who “counts.”

And that’s just “famous.” It gets even muddier when we go onto “most-influential.” Oh well, at least everyone knows when it comes to “best” that its just straight-up unarguably subjective and we can all admit its just our own opinions. (Well, the sensible ones of us at any rate.)

So; With all that being said, I’d like you all to answer in the comments, who do you think are the 20 most famous Metal bands?